Today’s generic ramble is all about putting your face out there. Standing up for what you believe. Representing for your cause. Living, as it were, out loud.
I write under an assumed name, it’s made up. Not me. I do this to keep my writing slightly separated from my personal and professional lives. Similarly, I used to have an iron curtain between my social media and LinkedIn. Nary the twain shall meet- my work people will know nothing of my personal life.
That has kind of broken down a bit over the past few years. The more comfortable I get with me, the more confident I get with my career, the less I care about someone in work seeing a photo on Facebook. Some of that has to do with the frankly astonishing level of privilege I live with. Some of that has to do with keeping the people in my personal life who really care about me. Some comes from hitting my mid thirties and a pandemic and finding not one fuck left to give!
I was recently asked if I was so supportive of the idea that erotica as a genre should not be a source of embarrassment or shame, why I didn’t own the fact that I write it? I shrug off interest in my writing with a ‘just you know, fiction, fantasy stuff…’ and change the subject, whereas in my Chase-verse I wax lyrical about how liberating and fabulous Romancelandia is.
I was, momentarily, stumped.
I am a firm advocate for people living their best life, being comfortable in their own skin, and being accepting of everyone’s weird. Why should I hide what I enjoy? It doesn’t hurt anyone. It’s fun. I work hard at it.
I hide because I am afraid people will assume I do all the things I write about. (I mean, not no, but not all of it). I hide because I don’t want people I work with to start treating me differently, or be creepy because they think they know something intimate about me. I hide like women who have OnlyFans hide, no one wants some one in the lunch queue to breath into their ear that they saw something and now they think they have something ‘on’ you.
I hide because I don’t want to be treated with less respect.
So, do I therefore, think the writers and readers of erotica deserve less respect?
Fuck no. Never, not a bit, and for good measure, no, nein, niet.
I want to live what I believe, and be at the forefront of the movement of people advocating for kink-positive, consensual, diverse, inclusive, and intersectional media.
I believe everyone deserves respect regardless of their consensual kins, reading habits, or other involvement in the genre.
So, I should start owning my involvement and advocating for that respect.
Step one: Make the Plan- say so.
Step two: Execute the Plan- be so.
So- I am going to tentatively start cross-posting between my Chase-verse and actual reality.
See you on the other side folks, Frankie will still be my mainstay, so keep an eye here as all updates will land here first. But we’ll start seeing behind the curtain soon
Love all, Frankie xx
Speaking as someone who also writes erotic literature and under an assumed name although frankly I don’t think I am hard to identify. I tend to keep the erotic under that name so other people can feel more comfortable in speaking and dealing with me. I’m happy to stand up and be proud of what I write (even though I am no where near as talented as I would like)… but I don’t want to lose friends who are not as liberated, not as comfortable with my stories because I have friends of all ages with all levels of comfort in sexuality… so I keep the nom de plume but you/we should be open and proud. It’s art, it’s fun, it brings people pleasure and it hurts no-one. All power to your pen.. or keyboard!
Hello! I also don’t think it’s particularly tricky to figure out who I am, and totally agree that keeping it out of the pockets of those who don’t wish to hear it is absolutely the thing. Also, I love your books, and am so glad you’ve sent them out so I can read them! xx