Tea

Recently our household had something of a debate over tea and how it should be made. For clarity, we are in the UK, so tea here is a hot beverage as opposed to and distinct from iced or sweet tea.

I have some fairly strong feelings about tea.

I don’t subscribe to the idea that substandard tea should be ignored or rejected- someone was thoughtful enough to make you a tea, be grateful and drink it.

I also used to work on construction sites, so I learned quick that if it’s hot and wet and in a mug, don’t think too hard about when the mug was last washed and just be happy there was sugar.

I do have some really wonderful memories about tea.

I used to make tea for my mum on her day off and bring it to her, and we’d have a few minutes blissful peace to catch up with each other before my siblings woke up and the day started properly.

My Grandma used to make us both a tea when I’d spend weekends helping around the house, awe’d drink it and eat home made flapjack and gossip about her choir.

We used to get tea from the café when I was at university and complain to each other about how hard our lectures were and how much we had to do. We were so young but felt so grown up, living away from home for the first time.

I made (still do make) tea for girlfriends going through breakups, handing Kleenex silently over and pouring with sympathy.

Our house now wakes up to a general call ‘Kettle’s on’ and we reply with preferences and enjoy the moment of human connection during a worldwide, isolating, pandemic.

There’s a lot of jokes about the UK and tea, and really we do deserve them, but if you get tea right, you can win an awful lot of us over.

So.

Tea for me is black tea, in a teabag, served hot with a dash of milk and one sugar.

Tea for other people may be milky and cooler, or include no sugar, or lemon instead of milk, or be a fruit tea, or green tea.

For me. Hot, dash of milk, one sugar.

(We will leave for today, preference on mug or teacup. I will drink mine from whatever it turns up in.)

Hints and tips for a proper tea;

• If using a teapot, the correct measure of teabags to add to it is one bag per person you are serving, plus one ‘for the pot’. That is Northern England slang, my Nan taught me it and I have no logic to offer you for why the teapot needs a teabag to call it’s own, it just does, it works, has worked for me for twenty years, I’m not arguing with my Nan. One per person to be served from said pot, plus on extra.
• If using a single mug, put a teabag in the mug.
• Boil the kettle.
• When the kettle has boiled, immediately, and I really mean this, as soon as humanly possible after the little light clicks off, pour the boiling water on the teabag in the mug/ teapot.
• (There are schools of thought about ‘warming’ teapots, essentially you swirl some hot water in the pot, pop the teabags in then add the boiling water. It’s good practice, but if you get the kettle poured quickly you can usually fudge it.)
• Add the sugar if you would like it. Adding it this early means it has the chance to dissolve fully before you cool the tea with the milk. I hate, and I really mean hate, getting the sludgy half-remaining sugar grit in the last mouthful of a tea.
• Allow the tea to steep. Your tea brand will tell you how long, mostly it takes about a minute for generic teas. Maybe give it a stir with a teaspoon. Do not, if you can help it, squidge the teabag.
• Remove the teabag once the tea has steeped. Check the color of the tea, I like relatively bold tea, so I steep mine for longer and remove the bag when a nice rich dark brown has been reached. Other people may like a weaker tea and merely flap the teabag at the water and scoop it away before the water looks darker than morning pee. I try hard not to ask for tea from these people.
• Stir the tea again once the bag has been removed, but BEFORE the milk is added. This gives the sugar the final kick it needs to dissolve properly.
• Add a small splash of milk and stir. I cannot stress this enough, if you throw the milk at it like you’re a holiday bartender pouring shots for the hot girl you want to do the dirty with, you will have a rubbish tea. Add a little bit, then check the color when the milk is stirred in properly.
• Add more if you like. Stir again.
• Tea is best drunk in a comfortable sofa corner, surrounded by comfort, with a couple of biscuits if you can get away with it.
• Tea is best drunk propping up the kitchen counter gossiping with friends.
• Tea is best drunk during a dull meeting, savoring the warmth of the ceramic in your hands and breathing in the steam.
• Tea is best drunk on a camping trip with friends, shaking off the
• Tea is best drunk on a crisp autumn morning when you let the dog out for a run and laugh at his excitement when there’s frost.
• Tea is best drunk with a good book.
• Tea is best drunk whenever you damn well need it, and however you damn well please. But for me, tea is a universal ritual shared with so many people in my life I can’t count.

I’m about to go and read a new book with a tea, see you all when I’ve finished!

Love, Frankie xx